The Zombie Master by AstroGirl (PG-13)

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

Fandom: BLAKE'S 7
Pairing: implied Avon/OCF, near Avon/Blake
Author on LJ: astrogirl2
Author Website: Betty Ragan's Home Page, but Betty's on-line B7 stories are in the Hermit Library
Why this must be read:

This is a riotously funny black comedy, written well before the film Sean of the Dead came out, or Noranti appeared on Farscape. I say this because the gruesome humour reminded me of the first, and the old Gaudan woman of the second, but this very original story has been languishing in zine limbo for years.

Avon, the sole survivor of the Gauda Prime massacre, encounters an old native woman who demonstrates that she can raise the dead. In return for a favour of a certain nature, she teaches Avon how to do the same. He re-animates the corpses of Blake and the Scorpio crew for a price: a human sacrifice and half of his soul--the little he has left.

Avon and his army of zombies were gathered around the breakfast table. Avon sat eating his own meal in silence and trying not to look too closely at the contents of the others' plates. The others, for their part, were generally attempting the same thing, albeit with rather less success.

And then, of course, there was Vila.

"I can't eat this!"

Avon calmly lifted a forkful of his own breakfast to his mouth and chewed. "Why not?"

"Why not? Why not? Because it's a human brain, Avon, that's why not!"

Avon, however is the zombie master of the title and his every order must be obeyed.

"Vila." Avon's tone was perfectly reasonable, and Vila looked up at him with hopeful eyes. "Shut up and eat your brains."

Vila's hand lurched out, grabbed the fork, scooped up a huge, gooey chunk, and popped it neatly into his helplessly struggling mouth.

Avon smiled.

"May I be excused, please?" said Dayna. "I think I've had enough."

Eventually the zombies decide to win back their independence the only way they can, a quest that takes them to the heart of the Federation and an ironic fate for Avon. Go and read it. It's a comic masterpiece as black as Avon's soul.

The Zombie Master (part 1)
The Zombie Master (part 2)

Comments

[astrogirl2.livejournal.com]

Aww!

It's interesting you should choose that passage to quote... With a lot of stories, much of my motivation comes from having one or two lines of dialog in my head that I like so much that I have to write and finish the story just to use them. And for some reason, "Vila, shut up and eat your brains" was that line for this story. :)

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I love that line. That whole scene stood out very clearly in my memory so I had to quote it.

[executrix.livejournal.com]

Poetic justice that a story about zombies would at last come back from Zine Limbo! I think the availability of this story is one of the best pieces of B7 fanfic news in a long time.

What potential readers should understand is how brilliantly sad this story is too.

[lizamanynames.livejournal.com]

Mmmmm, an excuse to re-read Astrofic. Have I mentioned I love that you're driving the van this month?

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

[grin] Thank you! Hope I don't crash; I drive on the left. ;-)

[lizamanynames.livejournal.com]

LOL!

Seems not to have caused problems so far around here...

[hafren.livejournal.com]

I drive on the left. ;-)

You mean to say there are people who don't????