ext_130185 ([identity profile] seremela2.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] crack_van2009-03-18 11:06 pm

Apprentice to Journeyman by Susan Smithson (NC17)

My next rec is a story about love. Not just about 'a' love, but also about love itself and the myriad ways it can be expressed.

Fandom: STAR WARS
Pairing: Qui-Gon/Obi-Wan
Length: very long, novella for sure
Author: Susan Smithson
On lj: unknown
Author Website: unknown; she has two stories on Masters and Apprentices
WARNINGS: not much IMO, but there will be male/male sex

Why this must be read: This story manages to dive right into what it means to be a Jedi and live like a Jedi. And I love the fact that it had me stop and think about what it says from time to time, despite the fact that I was so engrossed in it that it cost me a lot of sleeping hours. Susan tells us about Obi-Wan's love for his master, Qui-Gon, as we see him grow up as a Padawan. But as I said, it's not just a story about his love, it's also a story about love itself. Utterly beautiful.


Excerpt (the story starts when Obi-Wan is just fourteen):

They walked through a rooftop courtyard, one of Obi-Wan's favorites, in fact; seventy meters to a side and only a few dozen stories high, it was a verdant, lush intersection between dormitories, indoor training rooms, and the main dining hall adjacent to the west Temple entrance. Walls rose up on all sides, strewn with clinging plants and vines, and paths meandered through at seeming odd angles. His body goading him as they neared the center of the courtyard, he blurted out, "Master, is this stage so for everyone?"

"And what stage is that, Padawan?"

He glanced sidelong at his teacher, relieved at the calm contentment in the deep voice. Even in this short span of months with Master Jinn, he had already learned that the man usually knew the answer to a question before he asked it. "Adolescence. Puberty. This miserable sexual awakening."

"Ahh." Qui-Gon slowed, and gestured to a bench beneath an aging, spreading iquia tree. "And what is 'so' about this stage?"

He sighed, fidgeted for a moment, chewed on the inside of his lip for another. "I feel like a prisoner in my own body. These urges take me at odd moments. They leave me flushed and distracted. I can't control them, but I also have no desire to be, well, intimate with someone." Perish the thought; the girls' squealing annoyed him as much as their silent superiority-and the boys... no, he wasn't interested in touching or being touched yet, no matter what his body suggested.

"Most humanoid species experience something like this, yes," Qui-Gon answered quietly. "Just as a muscle is trained and exercised before it is tested with a partner, so is your sexuality. Your body knows this, and is beginning those exercises. If you aren't yet ready to practice that dance with a partner-and I agree that you're not-you need simply continue with private drills." Qui-Gon's grin seemed conspiratorial enough that he knew he was missing something important, but he wasn't quite ready to ask.

"I'd rather just make it stop," he sulked, crossing his legs under himself. "Can't I do that, instead?
"
 

Apprentice to Journeyman

pronker: snowflake promo (SWanimblue)

Re: AAARGH, I give up!

[personal profile] pronker 2009-03-19 02:44 am (UTC)(link)
I tried when I recced, also, and could not undo a tag. Good and unusual rec here.

[identity profile] voksen.livejournal.com 2009-03-19 04:40 am (UTC)(link)
I just wanted to say that I'm really enjoying this fic. Thanks for the rec!