"The Lovers' Curse" by amonitrate (Teen)

[stars-inthe-sky.livejournal.com]

Fandom: FIREFLY
Pairing: Simon/Kaylee
Length: ~5K words
Author on LJ: amonitrate
Author Website: amonitrate at AO3
Why this must be read: Sometime pre-Serenity, Kaylee mixes up two packages and hijinks ensue. "The Lovers' Curse" is quick reading and a lot of fun. You're also left with some pretty entertaining images, including one extremely amused Inara Serra.

Zoe and Mal got Jayne laid out on the examining table and stepped back. Mal wiped his hands on his pants and Zoe resisted the urge to do the same. Jayne had been slimy. As Simon went to work, a crowd formed in the doorway. Somewhere along the line the Shepard had joined them, frowning thoughtfully as Kaylee filled him in.

“I didn't poison nobody. Honest.” Kaylee said for the fourth time.

“No one thinks you poisoned him.” Simon said, distracted, as he stuck an instrument in Jayne's ear. Jayne batted it away and then groaned again as another cramp doubled him over.

River opened her mouth. “Only River and Jayne think you poisoned him,” Mal corrected before she could speak.

Kaylee crossed her arms over her chest and sulked against the doorway.

“I don't see anything to indicate a disease vector. I'll have to do some blood tests.” Simon announced, turning away from his patient. “It does resemble food poisoning; but we all ate the same thing at dinner and none of us are effected.”

A giggle rose from behind them, out in the lounge. Everyone turned to River, but the girl was silent.

Inara pushed her way through the bodies in the doorway. Her kohl-rimmed eyes were wide and unfocused.

The Lovers' Curse