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crack_van2006-08-28 11:01 pm
malabud.livejournal.com) wrote in crack_van2006-08-28 11:01 pm
Entry tags:
Canzonet by Pyxelle (G)
Fandom: STAR WARS PT
Pairing: Gen
Length: 9,000 words
Author on LJ:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
pyxelle
Author Website: Pyxelle, Pyxelle's Fanfiction.net Profile
Why this must be read:
Pyxelle is one of the best "undiscovered" writers in the Star Wars fandom. She's got a WIP that is a great Luke/Vader story, but I can't rec it since it's not finished yet. Instead, I will rec this absolutely hilarious fic that had me actually laughing out loud -- a rare occurrence indeed.
During the Clone Wars, Obi-Wan Kenobi came to be known as "The Negotiator." Because of that reputation, the Jedi Council decides to send him to a peculiar planet to negotiate a very sensitive and important treaty, one so important as to pull both Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi from the front lines of the war.
The problem is, the inhabitants of the planet Canzonet can only hear and understand singing. If you speak to them without singing the words, they cannot understand what you are saying. In addition, since Obi-Wan is negotiating through a particularly delicate situation, it is important that all his singing be in rhyme.
Now I know that the premise of this fic sounds laughable, but it works! Trust me on this. Surely somewhere in the vast Star Wars galaxy, such a planet as Canzonet could exist. And if it did, Obi-Wan Kenobi (who, after all, possesses Ewan McGregor's singing voice) would surely be the one sent there by the Jedi.
This fic is a delightful gem, and I heartily encourage everyone to read it. It'll make you laugh; I can practically guarantee it. Highly recommended.
* * *
The Negotiator, Master Kenobi is called. Mediation, they ask for. Go to Canzonet, Obi-Wan should.
The nickname that had started to creep into the lexicon of Coruscant's general populace had only embarrassed Obi-Wan at first, but he had honestly never disliked it. It had even been a bit flattering, truth be told, but the Jedi did not expect recognition of that sort. Modest as he was, even from beginning Obi-Wan had thought the whole thing was a bit silly. Still, it had never bothered him before.
But now that he was trapped on the beautiful planet of Canzonet, a rich, outer rim world that boasted over half of the galaxy's greatest living musicians and had a reputation for being one of the most lovely vacation spots in the known universe, he was growing to hate that nickname. The Negotiator. Really. Who dreamed these things up, anyways?
At least you didn't get saddled with the "Hero Without Fear." What half-brained mynok thought THAT one up? Couldn't they have used a bit of creativity? Are you telling me they honestly couldn't come up with anything better than THAT!
Not to mention they've obviously never actually met Anakin. Hero without fear? Hah! "The Hero Without Common Sense" would be closer to the truth. Or the "Hero With A Death Wish" or maybe even the "Lunatic With The Ability To Drive His Former Master Completely Insane-"
Stop it, Obi-Wan. This is getting you nowhere. It's not Anakin's fault you're here.
No. It's Yoda's.
Obi-Wan was finding it hard to keep the irritation from bubbling up as he remembered the calm manner in which Master Yoda had suggested him for this task. The emotion was actually nearer to true anger than Obi-Wan would have liked to admit, but he wasn't foolish enough to let it get to that point. No, he would complete his duty, as he always did, with the decorum and grace that befitted a Jedi Knight.
And then he would strangle Master Yoda.
Canzonet
Pairing: Gen
Length: 9,000 words
Author on LJ:
pyxelleAuthor Website: Pyxelle, Pyxelle's Fanfiction.net Profile
Why this must be read:
Pyxelle is one of the best "undiscovered" writers in the Star Wars fandom. She's got a WIP that is a great Luke/Vader story, but I can't rec it since it's not finished yet. Instead, I will rec this absolutely hilarious fic that had me actually laughing out loud -- a rare occurrence indeed.
During the Clone Wars, Obi-Wan Kenobi came to be known as "The Negotiator." Because of that reputation, the Jedi Council decides to send him to a peculiar planet to negotiate a very sensitive and important treaty, one so important as to pull both Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi from the front lines of the war.
The problem is, the inhabitants of the planet Canzonet can only hear and understand singing. If you speak to them without singing the words, they cannot understand what you are saying. In addition, since Obi-Wan is negotiating through a particularly delicate situation, it is important that all his singing be in rhyme.
Now I know that the premise of this fic sounds laughable, but it works! Trust me on this. Surely somewhere in the vast Star Wars galaxy, such a planet as Canzonet could exist. And if it did, Obi-Wan Kenobi (who, after all, possesses Ewan McGregor's singing voice) would surely be the one sent there by the Jedi.
This fic is a delightful gem, and I heartily encourage everyone to read it. It'll make you laugh; I can practically guarantee it. Highly recommended.
* * *
The Negotiator, Master Kenobi is called. Mediation, they ask for. Go to Canzonet, Obi-Wan should.
The nickname that had started to creep into the lexicon of Coruscant's general populace had only embarrassed Obi-Wan at first, but he had honestly never disliked it. It had even been a bit flattering, truth be told, but the Jedi did not expect recognition of that sort. Modest as he was, even from beginning Obi-Wan had thought the whole thing was a bit silly. Still, it had never bothered him before.
But now that he was trapped on the beautiful planet of Canzonet, a rich, outer rim world that boasted over half of the galaxy's greatest living musicians and had a reputation for being one of the most lovely vacation spots in the known universe, he was growing to hate that nickname. The Negotiator. Really. Who dreamed these things up, anyways?
At least you didn't get saddled with the "Hero Without Fear." What half-brained mynok thought THAT one up? Couldn't they have used a bit of creativity? Are you telling me they honestly couldn't come up with anything better than THAT!
Not to mention they've obviously never actually met Anakin. Hero without fear? Hah! "The Hero Without Common Sense" would be closer to the truth. Or the "Hero With A Death Wish" or maybe even the "Lunatic With The Ability To Drive His Former Master Completely Insane-"
Stop it, Obi-Wan. This is getting you nowhere. It's not Anakin's fault you're here.
No. It's Yoda's.
Obi-Wan was finding it hard to keep the irritation from bubbling up as he remembered the calm manner in which Master Yoda had suggested him for this task. The emotion was actually nearer to true anger than Obi-Wan would have liked to admit, but he wasn't foolish enough to let it get to that point. No, he would complete his duty, as he always did, with the decorum and grace that befitted a Jedi Knight.
And then he would strangle Master Yoda.
Canzonet