Culture and Other Balls of Twine by LithiumDoll (G)

[musesfool.livejournal.com]

Fandom: AVENGERS
Pairing: none; team gen
Length: 17,035 words
Author on LJ: halcyon_shift
Author Website: at AO3
Why this must be read:

It starts with Tony taking Bruce on an unauthorized field trip to see the world's largest ball of twine and mushrooms into a hilarious teambuilding roadtrip (in the world's most expensive RV) while Tony thinks he's outsmarting Nick Fury (he's not) and also in denial about his grief after the movie. This story is sweet and funny and smart and also features washer/dryers that fight crime. Why are you not reading it already?

"Okay, I realize this could appear to be poorly conceived - to those of limited vision - but what you have to understand is, I’ve actually just had the greatest, most outstanding idea ever." Tony's eyes searched heavenward and then he nodded soberly. "Yes, I believe history will consider this my triumph."

Bruce stared at him from across the table, his empty fork paused in descent.

Tony pushed his phone to the side and leaned forward urgently. "Wait, hear me out."

"I am hearing you out." Bruce gestured to his plate with the fork. "Eating pancakes. Drinking coffee. Hearing you out."

"Huh. Usually people have started edging away by now. Or saying 'no' a lot and looking disappointed in my life choices. Weird."

Bruce shrugged. "They're good pancakes. Tell me your plan."

"Please." Tony raised a corrective finger. "My outstanding plan."

"Sure, tell me your outstanding plan."

"One word: twine."

Bruce paused again, this time with his pancake halfway between plate and mouth. "Maybe two words?"

"I'll go to six, I’m just that kind of guy: the world’s biggest ball of twine."

"You want to build one?"

"Why? I could just buy it, unravel a sweater and set a new record." Tony rolled his eyes at the obvious. "No, I want to visit it. I want us to visit it. Classic road trip."

Culture and Other Balls of Twine by LithiumDoll

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