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crack_van2006-04-07 09:57 am
laceymcbain.livejournal.com) wrote in crack_van2006-04-07 09:57 am
Entry tags:
Strange Bedfellows by Rose Emily (R)
Continuing with the funny ...
Fandom: SMALLVILLE
Pairing: Clark/Lex (relationship)
Author on LJ:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
rose_emily - (toomuchplor - fic journal)
Author Website: Earth Boys are Easy
Why this must be read: The author puts a twist on the "stuck in a hotel room together" cliche by getting Clark stranded with his father-in-law, Lionel Luthor. It's awkward, to say the very least. But when Clark phones home to get advice from Lex on how to handle the situation ... well, let's just say he learns that Lionel has some unusual sleeping habits. Nothing Philip of Macedon didn't have, of course, but still ... do the words "nocturnal thruster" mean anything to you?
"Clark, there's something you need to know about my dad."
Oh, god. Lex's dad had a team ready to attack. He had red kryptonite in his luggage downstairs. He knew all about Clark and Superman and he would do tests and Clockwork Orange conditioning and turn Clark into his Minion of Darkness and make Clark associate Kenny G with violence (more than usual). Clark was four minutes away from becoming Lionel's favorite lab rat!
"Clark, he's a -- oh, christ. He ... when he's sleeping ... Wait, which side of the bed will you be on?"
"What the hell does that have to do with anything?" Clark yelped, too loudly. "Lex, is he going to turn me into his personal supertoy or what?"
"He -- ew, Clark! No, you need know that he's a night humper."
"A night humper?" Clark repeated incredulously.
"Actually, I prefer the term 'noctural thruster'," Lionel submitted, emerging (in a robe, thank god) from the washroom, flossing his teeth idly.
"A nocturnal --" Clark repeated, yet more incredulously. "I -- have no words."
Read the story: Strange Bedfellows
Fandom: SMALLVILLE
Pairing: Clark/Lex (relationship)
Author on LJ:
rose_emily - (toomuchplor - fic journal)Author Website: Earth Boys are Easy
Why this must be read: The author puts a twist on the "stuck in a hotel room together" cliche by getting Clark stranded with his father-in-law, Lionel Luthor. It's awkward, to say the very least. But when Clark phones home to get advice from Lex on how to handle the situation ... well, let's just say he learns that Lionel has some unusual sleeping habits. Nothing Philip of Macedon didn't have, of course, but still ... do the words "nocturnal thruster" mean anything to you?
"Clark, there's something you need to know about my dad."
Oh, god. Lex's dad had a team ready to attack. He had red kryptonite in his luggage downstairs. He knew all about Clark and Superman and he would do tests and Clockwork Orange conditioning and turn Clark into his Minion of Darkness and make Clark associate Kenny G with violence (more than usual). Clark was four minutes away from becoming Lionel's favorite lab rat!
"Clark, he's a -- oh, christ. He ... when he's sleeping ... Wait, which side of the bed will you be on?"
"What the hell does that have to do with anything?" Clark yelped, too loudly. "Lex, is he going to turn me into his personal supertoy or what?"
"He -- ew, Clark! No, you need know that he's a night humper."
"A night humper?" Clark repeated incredulously.
"Actually, I prefer the term 'noctural thruster'," Lionel submitted, emerging (in a robe, thank god) from the washroom, flossing his teeth idly.
"A nocturnal --" Clark repeated, yet more incredulously. "I -- have no words."
Read the story: Strange Bedfellows
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