crack_van | First, by Ardent (NC-17)

Fandom: DUE SOUTH
Pairing: Ray Kowalski/Benton Fraser
Author's Website: http://ardent.mrks.org/
Author on LJ: ardent_muses

Why this must be read:

Continuing in the trend of rec'ing less-well-known authors and fics, today's story is one that to the best of my knowlege has never been rec'ed anywhere else (other than on my own website) - a fact which never fails to amaze and baffle me, because it is just so wonderful. I've always thought it deserves to be far more widely known than it is - and it occurred to me that I am in a position to make that happen!

I love stories that show the growth of the relationship from something the guys think - or fear - might be just casual or temporary or convenient into something real and deep and permanent, and First is a gorgeous example of the genre. It's a series of vignettes, from Ray's POV, each describing a number of his "first times" with Fraser and ordered in a way that illustrates the evolution of their relationship from friendly but casual sex to something much deeper: it begins with the first time they kiss, moves through a variety of other firsts, like the first time they have sex and the first time Ray sees Fraser cry, and ends with the first time they make love. Each scene is sparely written and yet chock full of wonderful little touches and images that bring the characters to life and illustrate their feelings without any unnecessary exposition. (In that aspect it's reminiscent of some of Resonant's fic.)

The tone is wonderful. Many of the scenes are deeply moving, and some are incredibly tender. I particularly love the description of Ray's efforts to convey his feelings to Fraser, after an incident earlier in the day brings home to him how important Fraser is to him and how much is at stake here:

That night, Ray put a little more effort into everything he did. He made Fraser a cup of tea just the way he liked it, without bitching about how tea bags were so much easier. He called the take-out place and ordered the weird Chinese food Fraser liked -- the stuff that had ingredients Ray couldn't identify. And hey, if you didn't look too closely, it wasn't half bad.

Then he took Fraser into the bedroom and pushed him back on the bed and unlaced the boots all by himself. It took a while, and Fraser was practically asleep by the time he was finished, but he didn't give up and ask for help.

He crawled up and finished undressing them both, and then he kissed Fraser for a long time, the way Fraser really liked it....

Passages like these (and it gets even better from there) hit me where it hurts - but the interjection of bits of gentle humor throughout lightens the tone and keeps the story from ever getting sappy or mawkish or bogging down in sentimentality. One of my favorite of these lighter bits is the giraffe documentary they're watching the first time they have sex:

The giraffe show was still on, and when the narrator started explaining about the giraffe gently nudging, sniffing and licking his mate before mounting, a crazy part of Ray's brain wondered whether Fraser had done this before or whether he was taking instructions from the Discovery Channel.

Who really cared, though, when Fraser had moved up to Ray's mouth again and was kissing him with his flexible upper lip and prehensile tongue?

That's just so Ray - and so Fraser, for that matter, watching a giraffe documentary while they're having sex! These lighter bits are interwoven with the deeper stuff in an incredibly effective way, so the emotion never gets cloying and the story never feels heavy-handed.

Another wonderful thing about First is its rhythm: it flows seamlessly, organically, from one scene to the next in a way that feels easy and almost inevitable, without any indication of the effort that goes into structuring a story like this, into making a series of vignettes come together into a coherent whole. It's deceptively simple (another way in which it reminds me of some of Resonant's writing). The progression of the relationship seems similarly inevitable, and the ending turns me into a big mushball. Yet the guys are always definitely guys, which is very important to me; in the first passage above, for example, Ray shows Fraser the depth of his feelings in such a very guy-like way, without ever saying a word.

First is a relatively short fic, only 5 pages or so. I tend to prefer length and depth, so it's not all that often that I'm blown away by a story like this. But First blows me away; I've never been able to resist it from the first time I read it, and it amazes me how the author manages to put so much feeling into such a little story. It's sweet and achingly romantic but in a good guy-ish, non-cloying way; it's humorous and touching and insightful and - of course! - a little bit hot, and it never fails to make me feel warm and happy inside. It's just a gem, and it deserves to be more widely acclaimed. I'm glad to have the opportunity to share the joy.

First

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I'm glad you recced this, since it really is one of my favorite stories in all of DS. Reading it always makes me feel just a little bit happier when I'm done.

It's one of my favorites too (obviously!). I'm glad I had the chance to spread the joy :-)

Hee! I have this one on my LJ info page as my mascot story (with Ardent's permission, of course).

"A sticky, minty dream.

With giraffes."

The very best kind. *g*

I love that line! Sticky, minty dream with giraffes ... ::sigh::

I love giraffes too - they're one of my very favorite animals :-)

I love this story, and there were quite a few of us who recced it in our LJs or blogs when it first came out. I'm thrilled to see it getting more attention, because it really does deserve it.

Here's hoping Ardent finishes the sequel!

Will the sequel have giraffes too? *g*

I don't know--you'll have to ask Ardent! ;-)

Yes! I desperately want the sequel too!

And when I said it hadn't been rec'ed, I was referring to "real" rec sites - I'm sure it was mentioned by dS people in their LJs (at least I hope it was it should have been!), but those generally aren't really accessible for people who are looking for recs.

It's such a wonderful story - it really, really deserves wider recognition. I'm glad I had the opportunity to share it.

Oh wow. That was one of the most beautiful DS stories I've ever read. Beautiful and soft and touching but still them which is the most important thing. What a great rec. Thank you!

You're welcome - I'm so glad you liked it. You're right, it's truly gorgeous, and so in character ... it's been one of my favorites since the first time I read it.

(And I still am just *gah* about your icon ....)

Delighted to see this recced-- it's one of my all-time faves! I would've recced it on flashback when I was a reccer, but it wasn't old enough, damn it!

I was going to rec it on flashback - there's actually no rule that a story has to be old; a newer story that's not well known is acceptable too. But I thought it would get much wider coverage on crack_van, and it really, really deserves it! As you say, one of my all-time faves.

Oh, yes, this is a wonderful story. I remember reading it and having a visceral reaction, as if I'd been touched by an electric wire. It's beautifully written, and cleverly constructed. What a good choice!~

Thank you! And yes, you described it really well - my reaction the first time I read it was visceral. It really touched me, moved me, made me all ... squishy or something. Such a gorgeous, gorgeous story.

Hooray! So glad you recced this wonderful story!

Aw, you say the sweetest things, cookie! :)

I'm quite overwhelmed and honored. Thank you. :::sniffle::

Oh, you know, you are so much more than welcome - it is I who should be thanking you; I'm the one who has the pleasure of reading it! I'd planned to rec First on flashback; I'm glad I decided to do it here instead, because it deserves as much recognition as it can possibly get.

You're just amazing, and I love everything you do - can't wait to see more Is there more dS in the works (someone up above alluded to the First sequel, which I remember you mentioning to me - or was it not really a sequel, but a companion piece ...)? I hope so! (And of course I owe you some comments on Simply Ray - I'll get there).

Anyway, I'm really glad I could do this - and sorry it's taken me so long to respond to your comment; somehow the comments to this post totally slipped by me and I didn't respond to any of them!

Thanks for this rec--I hadn't read this story, or anything elese by Ardent, and I really enjoyed the story.

This is a new fandom for me, and I already can tell I prefer the stories that have elements of humor to lighten any emotional heaviness. "First" does a fab job of balancing those elements.

(Note: I deleted the first version of this comment because I messed up the links and formatting)

First, welcome to dS - it's a wonderful, friendly, welcoming fandom, or at least I've found it to be that way. And there is so much fantastic fic. A lot of the best of it is like First in that it has humor (common in dS stories, since there's so much wacky humor in canon), but never becomes farcical or slapstick because the humor is balanced with real tenderness and depth of feeling. In fact, just about all the really best dS fic (in my opinion, of course) has at least some humor, and some has much stronger humorous elements - for example, among those I rec'ed last month, Juggling Act and The Bodyguard by Speranza, American Way and Sixteenth of June by Resonant, Parental Guidance, What We Talk About When We Talk About Wolves ...

Anyway, I'm not sure how familiar you are with dS, but if you want additional recs you can check out

ds_flashback, the model on which

crack_van is based (though flashback is more aimed at forgotten or lesser-known stories). Also, you can check out my own website - it's a pretty good resource for a newbie to the fandom. I list my own favorites, but more important, it has a compilation of fics that are rec'ed on other people's websites, as well as a list of those rec sites and a list of archives and other dS-related links. You might find it useful. It's here (http://justacat.slashcity.org).

And again, welcome to the fandom, and thanks for commenting :-)

First, by Ardent (NC-17)

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