crack_van | I'll Undress Myself for You if You're at All Interested by Makesomelove (PG)

JOE TROHMAN, you guys. He's like a human version of the rainbow that god sent after the flood to promise that shit would never happen again and everything was gonna be a-okay. This story gives good Joe.

Fandom: Bandom (interband)
Pairing: Brendon Urie/Joe Trohman
Length: ~ 3,000
Author on LJ:

makesomelove

Why this must be read: Because it manages to make me want to say "whimsical" and mean it in a good way? That's a pretty big deal. In this story, Brendon finds that everyone has a ladyfriend but he. So Joe says he'll be his ladyfriend, no problem. The tale of their love is a strange and beautiful one. For example, Brendon gives Joe a mullet.

"This mullet is like, the reincarnated form of the father of all mullets," Joe says. "It's Mullet Buddha. Look at this thing."
"It's truly a sight to behold. I'm getting a little misty eyed," Brendon says, sniffling and wiping his eye with his sleeve.
"Okay, please cut the rest of it now."
"How can you ask me to do that? This mullet is like my child. I gave her a name."
"Why is my mullet a girl?"
"It's like how ships are girls. All mullets are girls. Her name is --"
"Don't tell me!" Joe interrupts. "Then I'll feel bad when you kill her."

Then they give each other things, and it is darling. Oh, and in the sequel (which is here, shhh: secret sequel rec) the pattern continues with Brendon giving Joe a plant and Joe giving Brendon what for. And I just realised that both stories end with washcloths, which, who doesn't like washcloths?

I'll Undress Myself for You if You're at all Interested by Makesomelove