THE SENTINEL
Pairing: Jim and Blair
Author on LJ: therentgirls

“He squeezed my hand tight and for a second I was transported back to that night on the balcony when I told him the stars above our heads belonged to us. Back to the night I gave him the closest thing to a declaration of love I'd dared. Back to the night I secretly dreamed was one in an unending string of nights we'd be together.

Blair coughed softly and I was snapped back into the horrible present.

"Besides, man, this, this thing between us," his voice was so kind and gentle it hurt my ears, "just isn't working out. Don't get me wrong, Jim, you've been great. You've been more than I could have ever asked for."

"But?" I prompted. The cool, silvery knife-like pain he was piercing my heart with wasn't enough. I wanted him to splay and gut me.

"I'll always be your friend, Jim. Hell, you're the best friend I've ever had. You've always been there for me, man, and I'll never forget that."

I couldn't stop myself. I had to know everything. He was trying to spare my feelings when what I needed was him to cut me just a little deeper so I could die.

"But?" I said again.

"We want totally different things out of this. We're both looking for something we're never going to find with one another." I thought he might cry but instead he smiled. "Staying together like this is wrong and you know it. It's holding us back from finding what we really need. We both deserve more"

- And the greatest tragedy of this sad story is that nothing is resolved. There is no happy ending – for that, you have to read the equally excellent sequel, Near Misses.

Dark, angsty and thoroughly delicious.